My Thoughts on the Will Smith Oscar Slap
According to Wikipedia, the definition of conflict is a struggle and a clash of interest, opinion, or even principles. Conflict will always be found in society; as the basis of conflict may vary to be personal, racial, class, caste, political and international.
And at the latest Oscar awards, we saw conflict occurring right in front of our eyes. This was in the form of Comedian and host Chris Rock making a joke about Jada Pinkett Smith’s (Will’s wife) bald head who is an alopecia sufferer. Will then retaliated by walking up on stage and slapping Chris across the face.
Many of us assumed this was some kind of comedy skit until Will sat back down yelled to the presenter “keep my wife’s name out your mouth” and was visibly upset. Needless to say, the world was stunned. And like all conflict, there is never one clear answer but let’s dive into my thoughts about this and what my takeaways were.
Should the Oscars be accountable?
We are going through a time as a society where we are trying to purge ourselves of anything toxic. We have seen this through many political movements such as the me-too movement that are trying to move our society forward as a whole. Things that were okay twenty, ten, or even five years ago are no longer okay today.
And this makes me wonder, why do these events, hire comedians to make fun of the audience at all? I understand that it is the job of comedians to push the boundaries and this makes sense at a comedy show. But at an event that is supposed to be prestigious, should the hosts really be making jokes like these, especially over something that someone doesn’t have control over?
My hope is that the event organisers think twice about this and alter the way they run the show moving forward. I know many do believe that the rich and famous should be able to poke fun at themselves but I personally think they are just humans, and should be treated with the respect that all humans deserve. And making fun of someone’s medical condition, I believe, simply doesn’t belong at all but especially at an event that is contrived to celebrate film.
Should Will have resorted to violence?
Absolutely not. The answer is just a straight no. However, I think it is important to look a little deeper and to assess why the retaliation occurred in the first place and see what can we learn from it.
The reality is that we are not taught about how to handle conflict and conflict is one of the only things that is guaranteed in life. And for someone like Will who has done a lot of work on himself over the years, it is likely that he does now know how to handle conflict in a positive and helpful way. But, does anyone really know how to handle the exact situation that he was in, where his wife’s medical condition was made fun of on a night that was supposed to celebrate him, in front of all of his loved ones and peers?
The answer is also no. There is no rule book for how to handle that exact kind of situation. And he clearly was overwhelmed by his emotions and felt the need to react with violence. And this is a shame because he really could have shut Chris down with simply his words which are more often than not, a lot more powerful.
But it is all well and good to say, however, when we are in these situations ourselves, most of us have not been taught how to pause, how to breathe, and how to move through our intense emotions so that we are able to address the conflict in a way that is appropriate and yet effective. So as much as his behaviour is not acceptable, I do believe we need to approach this with empathy as we don’t know how we ourselves would have responded at that moment.
Did his actions come from a place of privilege?
I couldn’t help but think about how things would have been so much different if it was a woman who got up and slapped a presenter. As women, we have to be very careful not to ever have even the smallest of outbursts because then we will be labelled as crazy. And in Hollywood, once you get the crazy label, you probably aren’t going to get work anymore.
In society, women don’t have that many positions of power because we are “too emotional”. And yet time and time again, we see men, not being able to control their emotions.
And this is super frustrating because I don’t think women need defending like this. When Chris made the joke, Jada rolled her eyes and was clearly not impressed. And this I think is a great reaction. Afterwards, she could have spoken out on the matter and could have addressed how making jokes about someone’s illness is not appropriate.
If this happened at a regular work party it would be very likely that there would be serious repercussions, so even when dealing with the rich and famous, I think it is important to set boundaries about what is okay at work and what is not through consequences.
Should there be consequences for Will?
Over the last few years, we have seen cancel culture take down many people in power. And in many cases, this is rightfully so. Sadly, we have also seen cancel culture go just a little too far.
It would break my heart if society tried to cancel Will over this. Mostly because I think situations like this happen all the time in life and instead of simply cancelling people for acting in a way that we don’t want them to, we need to look deeper and conflict resolution needs to occur. Having said this, there are always going to be consequences to your actions.
I think back to high school and if two people got into a fistfight, it was likely that they were going to be suspended. So, an appropriate consequence may be that the academy suspends Will for a short time. Another natural consequence may be that the world feels a little let down by Will.
Many of us grew up watching Will’s movies and in recent years have seen him open up and be vulnerable on Red Table Talk, on his YouTube channel, and in his latest book. So, it only makes sense to be a little disheartened when someone that you look up to acts in a certain way. Although it is important to remember, that even the people you look up to are just human. Will’s team and colleagues may also feel let down as they worked hard on the film King Richard and might feel that their moment was outshone by his actions.
Many people around the world may feel triggered by this and it will bring up their own experiences with violence in the workplace. It personally brought up a memory for me where I worked at a café as a teenager and my boss open palm slapped another teen’s face so hard that it hit a car’s bonnet. I immediately quit after that incident because I didn’t feel safe and because I don’t think those types of incidents should occur at work.
So, for many people who have lived through these kinds of experiences, it may take them a little while to warm back up to Will. And some may not be able to forgive him at all, and that’s okay too. But whatever someone’s stance may be, ultimately the bulk of the consequences should be up to the involved parties.
Chris is within his rights to press charges if he wants to or to simply not talk to Will again. Will could try to facilitate some form of conflict resolution, and all parties could speak out and try to turn this whole incident into a learning experience.
What are your thoughts? As always, I would love to hear in the comments below xo
